I picked up the family iPad to look up a recipe, and my whole marriage ended. That’s not an exaggeration. That’s literally what happened. .
My wife, Corrine, has always been terrible with technology. For ten years, I tried to help her understand how her iPhone worked, how syncing worked, how anything worked. She never got it. And thank God she didn’t.
Because that’s the only reason I found out she was cheating on me with her ex-boyfriend, Desmond. The same ex she told me she broke up with over a year before we even met. The ex she never told me she had cheated on it in the first place. .
We met at a high school football game in our town. She was a teacher at that school, and I worked in data science. We hit it off immediately, got married, had an eight-year-old daughter, and built what I thought was a solid life. Nothing majorly wrong with our marriage.
At least, not that I could see. We loved each other. We were partners. Or so I believed.
. Our daughter got an iPad when she turned five. It was mostly for her, for educational stuff and some Roblox on weekends. Sometimes I used it to watch videos or paint digitally.
When we set it up, I signed in with Corrine’s Apple account because she used it more than me. I have my own laptop and phone. I probably touch that iPad once or twice a month. That’s how this all went unnoticed for so long.
. One day, I picked up the iPad to look up a recipe. I opened iMessage out of instinct, thinking I’d text Corrine about an ingredient. Then I remembered it was her account.
And instead of putting it down, I got curious. I started reading her messages. I wasn’t looking for anything specific. I just felt the urge to look.
And what I found made my blood run cold in seconds. . A conversation with a guy named Desmond. Her ex-boyfriend.
The one she said she’d been in love with, but something traumatic happened,and they broke up. I always assumed he’d been abusive or something. I never pushed for details because she said it was painful. Turns out, she was the one who cheated on him.
Back then, she cheated on him with someone close to him, and he was the one who ended things. She never told me any of that. And if I had known she was capable of that, I never would have married her in the first place. That should have been the warning sign.
I was too blind to see it at the time
. The messages showed she reached out to him recently, supposedly to apologize properly for breaking his heart. He accepted the apology, said he had moved on. Then she kept texting him.
At first, it was subtle flirting. She’d mention how nice he looked in a certain outfit. Then it got bolder. She talked about how she missed his lips.
I could feel my stomach turning as I scrolled through weeks and weeks of messages
. Then she talked about how she remembered his penis vividly, and how badly she missed it. He sent her a picture of it. She reacted shamelessly.
Then came the sexting. Then came the meeting up. I could see in the messages where they arranged to meet, and afterward they texted about how good it was. They had already slept together multiple times.
All while I was at work or home, thinking my marriage was fine. All while my wife was teaching at the same high school where we fell in love, pretending everything was normal
. Those conversations started about three months ago. Three months of this.
Three months of her betraying me, betraying our daughter, betraying everything we built. I read every single message. I documented everything. Screenshots, saved conversations, all of it.
And then I sat there, alone, realizing that the safety of my marriage was gone. And that I was going to have to put my little girl through a broken home. That part still hurts me more than anything else in all of this
. When Corrine came home that day, I had to fight to put on a straight face.
I couldn’t look at her the same way. I didn’t want to call it hate, but it was something dangerously close to it. I knew I needed a divorce lawyer. I knew I needed to confront her.
But I also knew I had to do this right,end specially for my daughter’s sake. I don’t want my daughter growing up in a broken home. But I can’t stay with a woman who threw herself at her ex while I was at home raising her daughter with her. That ship has sailed.
And I know for a fact it was never my fault. I did my best for both of them
. Finding the right divorce lawyer was harder than I expected. Eventually, I had to ask a friend who’d been through a divorce who he used.
I met with the lawyer, laid out everything, and paid him for his services. I wanted to have divorce papers ready to go before I confronted her. In a perfect world, I would have waited until everything was perfectly in place before I said anything. But I struggled to keep my emotions in check.
It’s one thing to read stories about people handling betrayal perfectly. It’s another thing to be the one betrayed. Your emotions bubble up because you can’t help it
. I was planning to have her served the next day.
But that evening, she tried to cozy up to me in the living room. She touched my arm. She smiled at me. And something in me just snapped.
I couldn’t wait anymore. I waited until our daughter was asleep, and then I confronted her
. “How’s Desmond? ” I asked.
. She nearly jumped out of her seat. She stared at me with a confused expression,and she didn’t speak for a long time. Then she asked,“Do you mean Desmond from before we met?
” I told her there wasn’t anyone else I could be talking about. She said she didn’t know how he was doing because she hadn’t spoken to him in years. She insisted she hadn’t talked to him in at least two years. She said he had reached out once back then, they spoke briefly, and it went nowhere
.
That lie irritated me more than anything else. Because not only were they actively speaking,she was the one who had initiated it. Not him. She was the one who reached out to apologize,then flirted,then sexted,then slept with him.
So I calmly explained to her how syncing works. How her iPhone and her iPad share the same iMessage account. How I could see her entire conversation with Desmond. And how, even without addressing the content, she had just lied straight to my face
.
She started fidgeting, looking restless. She knew she was trapped. I told her I was going to address the content of the conversation,because that was the real reason our marriage was ending. Her eyes widened.
I told her she was the one who started flirting. She was the one who pushed it forward until they slept together,multiple times. From the very first message, she wanted to sleep with him. And she got what she wanted,despite having a husband at home.
I told her she needed to be ashamed of herself
. She just stared at me like a clueless fool. She had no idea what to say. She knew a simple sorry wasn’t going to cut it.
She was too smart to try those stupid excuses like,“It’s not what it looks like. ” I told her our daughter was going to grow up in a broken home. The same way Corrine had. She once told me she wished her parents had stayed together until she was old enough to understand divorce.
But they split when she was ten. And it really hurt her,having to jump between two houses. She said she wished she’d had a happy family growing up. And now she was denying our own daughter that chance.
That was the part that hurt me the most. I asked her if she had anything to say. She just sat there with tears rolling down her cheeks. She looked really sad.
I didn’t care. I told her it was all her fault,and no one else’s. She ruined everything,for us,and for our daughter. I really laid it on because I wanted her to feel as terrible as she deserved to feel
.
By the time I left the room, she was full-on sobbing. That night,I went up to our bedroom,locked the door,and tried to fall asleep. It didn’t come. In the middle of the night,I started packing some of my essential things.
I knew I couldn’t stay in that house much longer. The longer I looked around the room and saw her things,the angrier I got. And with my daughter around,I didn’t want to let my anger get anywhere close to violent
. In the morning,we went through our usual pre-work routine,but didn’t say a word to each other.
She tried to talk to me. I didn’t even look her way. I said hi to my daughter as she was getting ready for school,and I told her I was going on a trip,but I’d come back and see her as soon as I could. When Corrine took her to school,and then went to work,I took all the things I packed to work with me.
When my shift ended,I found a decent,affordable place to stay
. Corrine got served at work. She called me once,then sent a message saying she had been served. Nothing else.
But when she got home and realized I wasn’t there,that’s when the calls started. I didn’t answer a single one. She called about every ten minutes for three hours straight. I didn’t pick up once
.
I know what you’re thinking. How could I leave my daughter like that? The truth is,if I’m getting divorced,I’m going to be essentially leaving her every other week anyway. I hate the situation.
But the only ways to avoid it are to either not divorce her,or keep living with a woman I was starting to hate. Neither of those is a real solution
. She kept sending messages,showing how distraught she was getting. She apologized countless times,begging me to just let her know I was okay,and that I hadn’t done anything to myself.
I wish she understood that she wasn’t worth me hurting myself. She wanted Desmond so badly,but the moment I left,she realized how much she needed me. If only I had been enough for her from the start,I wouldn’t have had to put her through any of this. It’s been five days since I left.
I even started working remotely so she couldn’t show up at my workplace and ambush me. I don’t mind it. I think some emotional turmoil is exactly what she needs to truly understand what she did. But I know I can’t keep this up forever.
I really want to see my daughter. But for now,I’ll let her sit with the consequences of her choices
. I got served at work. She called me once,then sent a message letting me know.
That was all. But when she got home and saw I wasn’t there,she blew up my phone. I didn’t answer a single call. She called every ten minutes for three hours straight.
I didn’t pick up once. I won’t lie,it was hard leaving my daughter behind like that. But if I’m getting divorced,I’m going to be leaving her anyway,almost every other week. What was I supposed to do?
Stay in a house with a woman I was starting to hate? That wasn’t a solution either. She wanted the thrill of Desmond,but she realized how much she needed me as soon as I disappeared. If only I had been enough for her from the start,I wouldn’t have had to put her through all this discomfort.
It’s been five days since I left. Some of her messages show how distraught she’s getting. She’s apologized countless times,begging me to just send a message,let her know I’m okay,and that I haven’t done anything to myself. I wish she understood that she’s not worth me hurting myself.
I’m working remotely now so she can’t ambush me at the office. I don’t mind it. I think some emotional turmoil is exactly what she needs to understand what’s at stake. But I can’t keep this up much longer.
I really want to see my daughter. For now,though,I’ll let her sit in the consequences of her actions
. Update two. I’m now happily divorced from my ex-wife,Corrine.
I want to thank everyone for the comments and support on my last post. It genuinely helped me get through this. I ghosted her for two weeks total. The only reason I finally showed up again was because I couldn’t bear to leave my daughter any longer than that.
I just appeared at the door randomly one evening. Corrine wanted to talk to me badly,wanted to know where I’d been. I walked right past her and went straight to my daughter. I saw Corrine tearing up while I played with her.
Once our daughter went to bed,she tried to start a conversation. I told her that wasn’t why I came. She told me she was lost without me,stressed out when I wasn’t there. She realized she’d made a mistake messing around with Desmond instead of focusing on me,loving me.
I brought up the fact that I knew she’d cheated on Desmond,and that was why they broke up. I told her that with that in mind,there was no way I was ever going to have anything to do with her again,because she cheated on him,and then she cheated on me. It was clearly a lifestyle she enjoyed,and I wanted no part of it. That hurt her a lot.
I made it clear it was just the truth
. The divorce process itself was messy. We couldn’t agree on things,so we had to go in front of a judge. I had all the evidence of her cheating.
My lawyer pointed out the fact that there was a dick pic in her messages with Desmond,and that our daughter could have had access to that image because of Corrine’s infidelity. That was a huge concern. I don’t know how much it swayed things,probably not much. In the end,she got to keep the house.
They favor the mother in these things. And she gets child support from me. But I won’t be paying alimony. I earn slightly more than her,so I’m going to hope that’s why,and not because she got rewarded for cheating
.
Once the divorce was final and custody was set,50/50,no surprise,I went straight back to ghosting her. If it wasn’t my week with my daughter,or I didn’t have to talk to her for any reason,I had nothing to do with Corrine. She still felt attached to me,so she tried to keep small talk going,because,as she said,I was still her best friend. That only made me commit to ghosting her harder.
At one point,she told me she was distraught without me,and that she’d made a mistake,and paid for it with the divorce. She wished I would still be there for her,at least for the conversations we used to have over the last ten years. I told her she lost that right when she decided to sleep with Desmond. She could talk to him instead.
He meant so much more to her anyway. Being divorced after so long is a very strange change of pace. But I’m hoping I’ll get used to it. Thank you to everyone who followed me on this whole infidelity journey.
I appreciate you all. And hopefully,now,I have no reason to ever post here again
.
